Looking Through The Glass

i.Loose Threads

I'm coming undone.

There are flakes falling to the ground, soft and white. My breath steams around me, barely any warmer than the night air. I stare upwards, watching pieces of the sky come down. It has been a long time since I doubted my own sanity.

For this is a prison, you see. There is the hard slab of a bed and there are the bars and there I am, huddled as far into the shadows as possible. Maybe it's been too long since my wrists were chafed like this, but these walls are dark and ominous and I don't know if I'm getting out of here alive. They say they want to 'fix' it. Fix me. They're about four years too late.

ii.Holding Together

You are in my heart and I'm sorry for that.

The sky is a bright hopeful gray today, as if it knows the clouds won't be returning any time soon. There's mist everywhere and people scurry from their cars to their destinations, ants under siege.

It's amazing how the weather here seems to reflect exactly how I feel. It makes me wonder if God picks one person's soul every day and turns it inside out, smothering the world like a blanket. If this sky is the inside of my soul, is this all there is to it? I always saw myself as patchwork, frayed ends and distorted shapes. Certainly not as smooth and empty as this.